I Did This For Rainy

I was taking my TGIF nap today when all of a sudden Mom rushed into the family room. I heard her calling my name but I ignored her thinking she would go away. I had no idea what she wanted and unless I smell food when someone walks into a room I want nothing to do with them. Mom did not have food and was not talking about food so I just laid there pretending to be asleep.

Apparently, Mom couldn't take the hint that I was sleeping so she got right in my face and started talking to me. I was only half listening because I was still a little groggy but I did hear a word I always dread hearing - bath. Mom told me that I was a hot mess and that there was no way she was going to let me meet Rainy until I took a bath. The next thing I knew I was in the car, headed to you know where.

I'm attending the ValenPug Party on Sunday hosted by NIPRA (Northern Illinois Pug Rescue and Adoption) and Rainy and her mom are going to be there. I tried to tell Mom that Rainy would like me better with my funky smell but she wouldn't listen to me.

I don't think I'm a hot mess. I had a bath last year and I'm still pretty clean. Just look at me. Here I am giving Mom the sad eyes but it didn't work. Dad turned on the water and then the real fun began.

I hate being wet. I don't like water on me and everyone knows that, but unfortunately it doesn't stop the powers that be from torturing me with it. I couldn't get far enough away from the sprayer and I nearly choked myself trying to hide from the water.

Instead of helping Dad wash me so that I didn't have to spend forever in the tub, Mom decided to take some video of me. Please ignore the squeaky, baby voice. Mom thinks I'm still a baby.

Once the water torture was finished the air torture began. Since we were the only group in the dog wash, Dad grabbed a dryer and I was hit with a double whammy. I hate the drying part almost as much as the washing part but usually one person dries me while the other person brushes me. I know Dad just wanted me to dry as fast as possible but the dryer scares me.

I was shaking because I was so cold. I don't think the heat was working because I nearly froze to death.

I'm not sure why Mom took another video of me, but she thinks I look cute with the air blowing all my fur around. I made sure to shake some on her just to get back at her for all the torture. That'll show her.

I just couldn't take the dryer any more so I cried until Mom unhooked me. I was so mad that I turned my back to her.

I was so ready to go home. I didn't care that I wasn't dry. I didn't care that I would get Mom's lap all wet on the car ride home. I just wanted to get the heck out of the dog wash. Can we leave now? I'm as clean and dry as I'm going to be.

I knew Mom wouldn't be able to resist my pitiful face so she picked me up and carried me to the car. I was sure I was going to get a Happy Meal after what I had been put through but Dad drove us straight home. Sheesh! I guess I'll have to drive myself to McDonald's after I'm completely drive. I sure hope Mom doesn't mind a pile of pug fur in her car. Ha, ha Mom. The joke's on you!